Today I saw the film, Selma, based on a few months in the life of Martin Luther King, and the battle of non violence he and so many others waged in order for African American people to be able to vote in freedom. 
It was a powerful movie and I cried many tears as mothers lost their children and hatred was allowed to flourish and have free reign over human bodies.
What I cried mostly for is that these same battles continue....for both women and men to feel equal, for religions to respect and make room for each other, and for all children to be allowed to grow and feel as though they can all have lives that they want....to live in freedom.
In our daily lives, for me this means what can I live with? What is acceptable to me? Sometimes (many times!) these questions way heavily and can lead to despair in the knowledge that I can do so little....but this is not true. For real freedom comes from within and this to me is the ultimate battle line.
Ghandi tells us that non-violence "the greatest force at the disposal of mankind. It is mightier than the mightiest weapon of destruction devised by the ingenuity of man"
This means we have to look deeply at the violence which exists already in our selves - our anger and our heartache can be destructive and debilitating, and can lead us into violent words and actions.
This morning I heard a mother berating and swearing at her teenage son in front of many people and I felt helpless in my own anger towards this woman creating a major scene while accusing her son of embarrassing her. I wanted to tell her many things but felt afraid of making things worse for her and her son and myself. So I kept on walking past. But also felt like this was a kind of cop out too. I really wanted to be able to step in with them and speak the right words that would calm the situation and make it clear that they will both be alright and that they both can speak from love, that it is possible to give respect and dignity towards one another, but I didn't know how to do this in the moment.
So today I also cried for this family that speaks with such violence and probably feels unloved by the world. And I find the courage to examine myself and see much anger and hate and war still lies in my own heart waiting for opportunities to pop out at very 'inappropriate' moments and usually launched at those closest to me.
Dr. King spoke about the power of Non-violence...
"Nonviolence is a powerful and just weapon. which cuts without wounding and ennobles the man who wields it. It is a sword that heals"
This is a very powerful way to come together to change big wrongs and make life more free for all of us...but unless we are that way with ourselves, and challenge ourselves in our own righteous angers and resentments, the battle remains skin deep. The ultimate struggle is in our own hearts and minds...and when we can bear this, we begin to grow the space within ourselves to truly see another...
So what do I do in the face of all this? I pick my battles...I practice compassion for myself knowing that I have the tendency to feel especially protective of children and I know that I feel scared of evoking more violence...so I take stock and work with what I can...I breathe and practice non violence with myself and my family first...then I try and make it grow by watering seeds of compassion and joy in others...and I speak up when I really can't bare it a minute longer!
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